November 2010

Let’s play together: Setting Up Successful Play Dates for Children with Autism

Creating opportunities to interact with peers can help your child with autism develop friendships and strengthen social skills. Social interactions in the natural environment can also support generalization of language and cognitive skills. Simply bringing a peer in the same room with your child is not going to be successful in the beginning. You need a plan and you also need to be directly involved in the play date.

1. Find peers who are willing to work with you and who are from your community, so there are frequent opportunities for the two children to interact in various settings. Of course, siblings are great to start this process with.
2. The length of the play date should be one with which your child is successful. The first few play dates may be very short, and you can alternate play time with snack time and outside activities to make it worthwhile for your child’s friend. You can determine the optimal amount of time by observing your child prior to scheduling the play date. Once your child is successful in the first couple of play dates, you can slowly increase the time he is expected to interact with his peer.
3. Start setting the play dates in an environment in which your child is comfortable and successfully completes other activities. After your child with autism has been successful a few times, you can gradually change the setting.
4. The activities you plan for the play dates should be based on your child’s abilities (start with something they are familiar and successful with), as well his/her preferences. Also, don’t forget to ask about the peer’s preferences. Incorporating both children’s preferred activities into the play date will ensure its success.
5. Have additional reinforcing items and activities ready to maintain your child’s motivation and to ensure participation in the activities you have set up for the play date. Remember that interacting with peers requires a great amount of hard work from your child, so make sure you support him/her throughout these activities. Your child will need progressively less “outside reinforcement” as they learn how to play with his/her friends.
6. Some skills to start addressing during play dates include: initiating and responding to greetings, imitating peer’s actions, following simple instructions presented by peer, sharing /turn taking, and requesting preferred items.

Your child’s first play date may not be a perfect play date. Your plan may need to be altered a few times. Don’t give up. Make small changes to your set up and continue to work on it. It will pay off in the end.
Also, please remember to have fun. Show your child how important and great it is to spend time with friends.